Having been exposed to the latest-generation M4âs design for a few years now, Iâve had a chance to build up a tolerance to its controversial grille. But I didnât foresee the steering wheel being so jarringly thick. BMWâs interior designer must have hands like Shaquille OâNeal.
Perhaps itâs an inbuilt bar for entry of sorts. Rather than needing to be tall enough for this ride, you just need to be enough of what the terminally online would call a âChadâ.
Once Iâd finally gained enough dexterity to wrap my fingers the whole way around it, though, I found the M4 Competition to be borderline perfect.
This irked me because I rather enjoy driving cars that industry âexpertsâ give ludicrously high ratings to and discovering that they fall well short of an 8/10 rating in reality. And for the last three years, Iâve enjoyed witnessing Essential Drivesâ founder Patrick Jackson attempt to temper my scathing criticisms.
Not this time, though. The BMW M4 Competition really is that good.
I didnât have BMW trouncing Mercedes-AMG in the engine stakes on my 2024 bingo card but here we are. The twin-turbocharged straight-six in the M4 Competition is a powerhouse that hits like a ton of bricks and sounds utterly brilliant. I was under the impression emissions regulations were killing noise, but not here.
The M4 produces an impressive cacophony of sounds that made the passers-by of Melbourne's Albert Park wave with joy. Come to think of it, they might have been flipping me off. I choose to believe they were appreciating a break from the banal tranquility of the area for the 364 days of the year it isn't being used as a Formula 1 circuit.
The M4 Competition isnât the automotive equivalent of Dillon Danis, mind you, as it can actually walk the talk.
I am convinced that BMW has created the worldâs greatest drivetrain with this right here. I have long believed all-wheel drive to be a dynamically inferior layout to rear-wheel drive, but the M xDrive system in this proved me wrong. The word âundersteerâ is not in the M4 Competitionâs vernacular. It grips, and grips, and then grips some more. Until it doesnât. At which point itâs the rear thatâs likely to allow the M4 to indulge in a bit of sideways heroics.
And to appease the Tokyo Drift generation, BMW pulled a âÂżPor quĂ© no los dos?â and allows the front axle to be turned off completely. This is an all-wheel drive and a rear-wheel drive car in one. Brilliant.
It steers wonderfully, too. The M4âs rack is sharp, direct, and dare-I-say intuitive.
Itâs easy to see why the M3 has long been the sports-sedan/coupe benchmark. Everything, from the chassis to the steering to the engine to the brakes, is just dialled in. Not once during my time with the M4 Competition did it put a foot wrong. Nor did it falter when it came to simply being a car â delightfully practical and luxurious in equal measure.
The BMW M4 Competition is, by some margin, the most complete car Iâve ever driven. It might be the most complete car full stop â even if you don't have hands like Shaq.
2024 BMW M4 Competition M xDrive Coupé
Price (MSRP): A$186,500
As Tested: A$193,493
Engine: 3.0-litre twin-turbocharged straight-six petrol
Transmission: 8-speed automatic
Drivetrain: AWD
Power: 390kW // 530PS at 6250rpm
Torque: 650Nm // 479lb-ft from 2750-5730rpm
Acceleration (0-100km/h // 0-62mph): 3.5 seconds
Top Speed: 250km/h // 155mph (electronically limited)
Weight (kerb): 1850kg (including 75kg driver, full fluids, and 90% fuel)
Economy: 10.2L/100km (claimed)
