In his essay 'The Decay of Lying: An Observation', Oscar Wilde posited that "life imitates art far more than art imitates life". The idea behind this oft-quoted line, when quoted in full, is that people crave the expression which art can provide, that art's value is in its life-affirming quality, and that it takes time for art to have a personal impact on people.
This is all relevant here because the Abarth 500e Turismo is one of the biggest imitators we've seen yet in the automotive industry. While plenty of electric vehicles have some form of fake engine sound generator inside the cabin – and even a number of muted petrol-powered cars do as well – the latest Abarth broadcasts its artificial sound on the outside.
Of course, the old Abarth 595's 1.4-litre turbo four-pot was one of the best-sounding hot hatches around, principally because its exhaust system was as close to straight-piped as you'll ever see from the factory. Unsurprisingly, it's this deep burble that the new 500 seeks to emulate.
One must wonder, though, if the Italians are a bit self-conscious of this feature. Rather than utilising the puzzling blank switch to the driver's right – this is a top-spec car, so what else could that be there for? – you actually need to delve into a myriad of menus in the digital instrument cluster to find it. Specifically, Vehicle Settings → Display → Electric Features → External Sound. Hidden away inside the Display settings menu? Puzzling behaviour from a car that stands out like a four-wheeled tennis ball.
Don't think that's an insult, either, because I absolutely love how this car looks, lurid colour and all. The regular Fiat 500e is already a stunner, but the sporty appendages and Abarth signature design touches and badging just make it look as fun as a hot hatch should.
This Acid Green and the menacing Poison Blue are the two star colours for this car, and both are featured throughout the Alcantara-clad interior in a wicked two-tone contrast. The seating position might take some getting used to – it's surprisingly high and upright, and as I discovered, the footwell isn't the most accomodating if you're a US size 12 – but you do start to warm to it, particularly with an excellent flat-bottomed Alcantara steering wheel.
Thanks to its practically square wheelbase, it feels as taut and chuckable as the old car, with its lithium-ion battery pack only lowering its centre of gravity. Whether you're comparing it to the myriad of EVs or hot hatches out there, you won't find anything that feels quite like this.
You won't find something that sounds like this in either camp because the noise this produces is... perplexing. It falls into the same uncanny valley as a conversation with ChatGPT that gets a little bit too real. You know it's fake, but from the inside at least, it does sound awfully convincing.
It's also awfully loud. 'Attracting the wrong kind of attention' loud. From the second you turn it on, it produces a droning sound that simulates idling, and that undertone remains there as it starts to go through the revs.
Being electric, though, there are no gears, so those revs just keep climbing and climbing and climbing until you feel like it must have the redline of a Honda CBR250RR. By the time you reach triple digit speeds, you'll be trying to go back through those many menus to turn it off. Bad luck, you'll need to be stopped to deactivate it.
From the outside, it's less convincing. While the reverberation from its sheer volume is enough to add to the in-cabin intensity, you'll need to be 20-feet away for it to have any effect as an onlooker – a bit like the looks of a replica kit car.
While it does take up room under the boot floor which would ordinarily be a handy storage space for the charging cable, there's fortunately no other effect it has on the way the Abarth drives. And, if you look past this one amusing-if-questionable attempt at trying to add some enthusiast appeal to it, there's still plenty to love without it.
This is a car that doesn't take itself seriously; it's unashamedly fun. Fun to look at, fun to be in, fun to drive – just fun in every way. Even the compromises are easy to forgive when it oozes this much character.
I wouldn't encourage you to trade your old Abarth in for this simply because a well-maintained manual model is a proper future classic in my opinion, but if you're mad about the 500 – as many are for good reason – or you're simply looking for the ideal city-friendly pocket rocket, it's almost impossible not to love it.
But if you do buy one, please, for the love of God, leave the fake exhaust turned off.
2024 Abarth 500e Turismo
Price (MSRP): A$58,900
Engine: Single electric motor, 42kWh lithium-ion battery pack
Transmission: 1-speed automatic
Drivetrain: FWD
Power: 113kW // 154PS
Torque: 235Nm // 173lb-ft
Acceleration (0-100km/h // 0-62mph): 7.0 seconds
Top Speed: 150km/h (93mph)
Weight (tare): 1335kg
Economy: 18.1kWh/100km (claimed)
